Julz (glowxstarz) wrote,
Julz
glowxstarz

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Te olvidare, me olvidaras

It feels like I haven't slept for days. I'm so tried. No exhausted. Like a zombie. You would think I were back on prozac. I'm not. I'd be asleep if I were back on it. Oh so tempting. That's not the life I want though, to have to depend on some substance to get a good nites rest. I've forgotten what it's like.

I've been listening to the same song over and over. It makes me want to dance. Grab a hold of someone dance in unison. Have the world stop and revolve around us. Then when the moment is right grab a hold of her hands pull her close to me, place her hands around my waist and keep them there, dance, become one, sway together, looking into eachothers eyes, smiling and kiss...get lost in one another and be happy. But as it would be...its hard to find someone who moves just right...the perfect fit...thanks Amanda...you made my top 8 by the way ;)...still care to dance?

A girl that I emailed with back and forth passed away, I always procrastinated responding...it wasn't that I wasn't interested in wanting to get to know her, I was...just I don't know. Now she's gone. I was even going to write to her the last day she logged on, but didn't make time for it. She was 20 years old. Her bday is the same day Danielle passed away if I remember correctly...she also died at twenty. A week away from her 21st bday. Hearing about Roxy passing away unleashed feelings I hadn't allowed myself to feel about Danielle dying. I was in denial. Didn't believe it, still can't. Didn't allow myself to mourn her...and now this.

I would rather lose contact with someone then to learn of their passing on. Or just avoid meeting people and getting close to them. Its not fair...
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